Julia Ruth turns 1!

On Sunday, March 11, 2012 my precious baby girl turned one year old. I can't believe that a year has already passed. My aunt sent me an email that said "the days are long, but the years are short." It's so true.

There have been many days this past year that I couldn't wait for a certain season to end. I couldn't wait for her to sleep through the night. I couldn't wait for her to become more active so we could do more things. Now that those times are gone, and she doesn't snuggle as much any more, I wish that she would wake up in the middle of the night and just snuggle. However, with each new season my heart abounds with joy when she says new words, the looks she gives me, the way she says "mama and dada". This little girl has brought so much joy into my life. I NEVER knew I could love so deeply. My life is forever changed.

I'm not gonna lie. Her birthday was also very hard for me. I woke up on Saturday prepared to celebrate her birthday, but not prepared for the immense sadness I would feel that Owen wasn't here with us. I wanted to be celebrating him too. And we did in our own little way, but I didn't think I would miss him so much. I wasn't prepared to still hurt for my son.

So we let a balloon go in honor of Owen. Just our little family of 3. Just a little something to acknowledge that Owen's life meant something to us. That even though it was short, it was special and made a lasting impact on our lives.

Then we went on to celebrate Julia Ruth. And that girl can party. She was so excited to have so much family come and play with her. She LOVED her first piece of cake, and once someone put a little in her mouth she devoured it.

Our family was so generous with gifts. Sweet girl got LOTS of new clothes which was wonderful because we are coming up on a season we don't have clothes for. She got some new toys that she enjoys playing with. One is her very own ball pit. She LOVES climbing in and out of it and throwing the balls out.

(I'll add pictures soon).


Sweet Julia,
You are one of God's biggest blessings to us. I love being your mama. I pray everyday that you would fall in love with the Lord. That He will give me wisdom to raise you in a way that would honor Him. I have learned more about who I am as a daughter of God from being your mom. I'm so proud of you, and I wait eagerly to see how you become who God has created you to be. I love you!! Happy 1st Birthday!

Month 2 Down and on to Month 3

Month 2 was harder than I expected, but I also did better than I expected. I was reminded about how much I love the Lord and how much He loves me! I was also reminded about how wonderful it is to worship Christ with fellow believers on Sunday morning. LOVE it!! I wasn't successful everyday, but I am doing better. I'm making progress!

This Month I am going to focus on exercise. That's right. Julia and I are going to go for walks and maybe jogs and enjoy being outside. And if we can't go out find something to do inside. I'm excited. I LOVE my little girl so much, and I love spending quality time with her. I also love how she is in the stage where she gets excited about everything. This month is gonna be good!

Insta-Friday

My friends all over are doing this Insta-Friday thing. I thought it was a cute idea, and I also like the idea of having a place every week that we can go back and show Julia what was going on.

Without further ado....Here's our week in review:

Julia recently got a tea set from her Aunt Freckles' friend Julia. She LOVES the spoons. There are 4 total and she LOVES to crawl around with one in each hand and two in her mouth.

This was Julia's 1st Valentine's Day!! She got some books about Love from us and the onesie that says "I Love Dad" on the front and "I Love Mom" on the back. She also had a Valentine's Play Date with Little Harry!

A friend ordered cupcakes for her son's Valentine Party at school. Their theme was "Heart Health" So we made "Peas and Carrots" cupcakes. (All proceeds go toward our adoption).

We also had some fun yesterday playing with purses, baby dolls, and the camera!

This is my favorite picture of the week. Paul just put her in the laundry basket to get her and her clothes upstairs. She had so much fun!!

What's going on with you this week?

Psalm 34

My resolution for this month was to read my Bible and grow closer to Jesus. I should have expected that making that resolution in and of itself would cause spiritual warfare. Why didn't I prepare for that?

I started going through a study entitled Run To Him. It is a journey through Psalms. It's been great for my heart. The past two weeks were hard for me to get in the word, but I've done it. Sometimes I just haven't wanted to.

My MOPS steering team has been praying for a family who sweet baby had some issues in utero. The doctors did some surgeries and then decided that he could come last Friday. They performed a c-section. I was so excited to hear that Graham had arrived. Then I heard that Graham's little lungs just weren't strong enough and they couldn't keep him alive. My. Heart. Sank. I was sick to my stomach. And frankly, I was down right angry with God. Why didn't He answer our prayers? Why did He allow this to happen. I'm not even sure I am angry. I think I am closer to pissed.

Sometimes I don't understand why God doesn't answer the prayers the way we want them answered. I don't understand why anyone has to lose a baby. I don't understand why the doctors made the decisions they made. I'm angry at all of them. I don't feel like this family should have to go through this. I know what it is like to lose my son, and what it comes down to is I don't want anyone else to have to experience that EVER. I'm using the word "I" A LOT! Have you noticed?

Here's what God said to me today in Psalm 34:18-19 "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in Spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all."

God is near to this family right now. They have trusted in Him this whole time, and that was not for nothing. That was so right now when they are hurting they would feel His strength and power. God is near to us  when we face trials. And we are going to face trials. It says it right there (and in many, many other places in the Bible), however, when we face trials God delivers us from them. He doesn't make us just stay in them. And one more greater thing is that when we face trials, and we are delivered, God also uses those to bless us and others. He doesn't leave us the same people we were when we started. He changes us for our good and His glory.

So, yes, I'm still mad that this family is going through this. I wish that this didn't have to happen, but I do know that God is near to them, and will bring them through this.

What trials are you facing? How is God using them for your good and His glory?