This past Sunday we had a pretty powerful sermon at church...well, God really used it to get my attention about this upcoming year and the resolution I need to make.
The sermon was out of Exodus 33 and 34 when God tells Moses to take the Israelites to the Promised Land, but He won't go with them. Moses tells God not to send them if His presence won't be with them.
I was really convicted about how I make resolutions each year. I always want to lose weight, eat healthy, exercise more. In and of themselves I believe those are good goals, but I never make them with God in mind. I make them because I want the approval of others, I want to control how people think of me or what they think of me, but never because that is what God has called me to.
So I've been praying the past couple of days about what I need to resolve to do this year. What is God calling me to do?
And then I remembered this verse that we sung from a song on Sunday:
" I surrender all to Jesus, I surrender all...Believing better things, Believing better things".
I've really struggled the last few years with surrendering ALL to Jesus. Some things are easy to surrender. Things like my dog, whether or not we have clothes to wear. Other things are harder...mainly my husband and my children.
I had a lot of anxiety early on in this pregnancy that Miss Amelia wouldn't make through the first trimester, then past 18 weeks, and now to the end. I'm nervous. I worry about the health of family. I wonder how I can raise two children if something happens to Paul. I wonder how I will survive if I lose another child.
And God has had us singing A LOT of songs at church about surrender. And one Sunday I couldn't sing the words because I didn't want to surrender. I often don't want to because that means I need to give up control. That scares the crap out of me. But God started working on my heart, and the more He chips away at my heart the more I realize that is what He wants from me...to SURRENDER ALL.
So this year's resolution is to Surrender All to God. My health, my husband, my children. Let Him have control, even though it scares me, because ultimately He is sovereign. He will use whatever happens for His glory and My good.
