My resolution for this month was to read my Bible and grow closer to Jesus. I should have expected that making that resolution in and of itself would cause spiritual warfare. Why didn't I prepare for that?
I started going through a study entitled Run To Him. It is a journey through Psalms. It's been great for my heart. The past two weeks were hard for me to get in the word, but I've done it. Sometimes I just haven't wanted to.
My MOPS steering team has been praying for a family who sweet baby had some issues in utero. The doctors did some surgeries and then decided that he could come last Friday. They performed a c-section. I was so excited to hear that Graham had arrived. Then I heard that Graham's little lungs just weren't strong enough and they couldn't keep him alive. My. Heart. Sank. I was sick to my stomach. And frankly, I was down right angry with God. Why didn't He answer our prayers? Why did He allow this to happen. I'm not even sure I am angry. I think I am closer to pissed.
Sometimes I don't understand why God doesn't answer the prayers the way we want them answered. I don't understand why anyone has to lose a baby. I don't understand why the doctors made the decisions they made. I'm angry at all of them. I don't feel like this family should have to go through this. I know what it is like to lose my son, and what it comes down to is I don't want anyone else to have to experience that EVER. I'm using the word "I" A LOT! Have you noticed?
Here's what God said to me today in Psalm 34:18-19 "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in Spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all."
God is near to this family right now. They have trusted in Him this whole time, and that was not for nothing. That was so right now when they are hurting they would feel His strength and power. God is near to us when we face trials. And we are going to face trials. It says it right there (and in many, many other places in the Bible), however, when we face trials God delivers us from them. He doesn't make us just stay in them. And one more greater thing is that when we face trials, and we are delivered, God also uses those to bless us and others. He doesn't leave us the same people we were when we started. He changes us for our good and His glory.
So, yes, I'm still mad that this family is going through this. I wish that this didn't have to happen, but I do know that God is near to them, and will bring them through this.
What trials are you facing? How is God using them for your good and His glory?
1 comment:
I love that verse. It helped me through the biggest trial of my life so far in college. I recited it all day everyday with tears streaming down my face. You're right, we don't understand why things happen, but it is comforting knowing there is a God who loves and cares for us all. One who will stay close to our hearts. Bless you friend. I'll be praying for that family.
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